Posted on Monday, September 5, 2016 by Jia Yue 2 minutes
Hello everyone! Welcome to the next post in the Myths vs Facts series!
Recently, Prince William and Prince George were the subjects of some online discussions because there were photos of Prince William squatting down to be at his son’s eye level during several events.
Photo credit: Getty Chris Jackson/Staff
Photo credit: Getty Richard Pohle/Staff
What was Prince William doing? The discussions mentioned that he was using a parenting technique called “active listening” by positioning himself to be aware of everything that Prince George is trying to communicate, and that this helps to foster self-esteem and communication in children.
Reading about this reminded me about some questions that had been asked by some parents previously. They wanted to know if it is necessary to devote their full attention on communicating with their child, even though the child is not talking and may not understand what was being said. The answer is, yes! So today’s post is on:
Myth #4: My child doesn’t understand / is not listening. I don’t need to talk to him/her.
Fact #4: Communication is important at any stage of a child’s development.
Babies start hearing sounds from as early as 19 weeks of pregnancy (Hepper & Shahidullah, 1994). A study had shown that newborns do recognise sounds that their mothers had said while they were still in the womb, indicating that babies start learning some sounds even before they are born (Partanen et al., 2013). If hearing and learning of sounds start from such an early stage, we cannot say that talking to babies or young children is unnecessary.
In addition, communication does not simply involve the words used during talking. Any method used to send messages between 2 individuals can be considered communication. For example, a baby’s cooing can be a message that they are happy. Or a baby reaching out towards a toy can be a message that they want that toy. If the parent hears the cooing or sees the child reaching out, they will be able to receive the message that their baby is sending. By acknowledging these messages, parents can help to foster communication and start building on the foundation for language skills.
Below are some simple strategies that you can use.
1. Be face to face: Use any method! Kneel down, squat down, carry your child, or lie down next to your child. Being able to see each other’s face easily helps both parties send messages more comfortably. Imagine having to look up to a person who is 3 times your height and see that person towering over you every time you want to tell him/her something, that does not seem too comfortable. So, try to move and be face to face with your child as much as possible!
2. Comment: Say more! Talk about what your child or other people are doing. This will help your children learn the words that can accompany observations of what is going on around them. Use simple phrases or sentences, especially when your child is still very young. For example, use single words or 2 word phrases if your child is only using single words, such as “eat! eat apple!”.
3. Wait: Give your child time! In our fast-paced society, we tend to rush through things. However, children are in the process of learning many new things everyday. Give them time. Wait for them to respond. Wait for them to initiate. How do we wait? Do not talk, look at your child expectantly, and don’t appear distracted by doing something else.
Do try out these strategies! They can be quite easy to implement. However, you need to make the choice to give your time and attention. When your child knows that he/she is important to you, he/she will be more likely to interact and communicate with you as well. Enjoy the precious time you spend together!
Communication is a 2 way interaction. Reach out to each other!
References:
Jia Yue has a keen interest in working with children with special needs, particularly autism spectrum disorders, whose difficulties may include the areas of speech, language, and social skills. She has been working with children with special needs for the past few years and loves to browse through toy stores for new therapy ideas in her free time.
